Scattered

I am feeling really scattered and all over the place.  I took a few days off from work in order to clean the house and get things accomplished.  What's happened is that I began the process and once I got involved felt overwhelmed because there is SO MUCH that needs to get done and I have barely scratched the surface.  

Wednesday, I spent most of the day cleaning our bedroom.  I love our bedroom; it is decorated so beautifully and the colors are so soothing.  Our bedroom wasn't too bad off, but I did laundry in conjunction with the cleaning and I have a lot of laundry.  I'm not done yet.  I have too much clothing.  I can go a month or more without doing any laundry.  I could probably go a few months and never wear the same thing twice.  I would really love to get rid of all of the clothing and only hang onto a few things, but a lot of the pieces have memories woven into them.  Take for example a black & pink dress I have - I bought the dress 4-5 years ago.  It's super cute and sexy.  I wore it several times.  I bought a pink/black sweater to wear with it, but that was so badly stained, I had to get rid of it.  The dress is reminiscent of a pin-up or goth type dress.  I don't know were the hell I would wear it again.  I wore it to the theater and my brother/sister-in-law's wedding.  So for now, it sits.  Another example is Gwynne's suit.  I've been meaning to give it back to her for so long.  I borrowed it for something, it didn't fit - I've never worn it.  She doesn't need it (since she works in pj bottoms & tank tops) and has probably forgotten it's here.  So it sits... I just need to get rid of so much stuff and don't know where to begin.  I have a LOT more cleaning to do.  I don't see how it is all going to get done.  

Wednesday night, Rick and I went to see A Raisin in the Sun produced by Arizona Theatre Company.   It was a very good production, with superb acting.  Rick and I each had different take-aways.  I identified with the male characters in the production, recognizing that men have dreams and that sometimes they have difficulty following them because they are expected to "be" men and serve their duty to their household as the primary bread winner.  Rick identified more with the female characters and saw how the male character was initially acting selfishly due to his resentment of not being able to follow his dream.  Of course, the show goes beyond this.  It also has a lot to do with segregation, african american education/intellect, prejudice, class, etc.  It is based upon a true story, which I don't think either of us knew.  

Yesterday, I mostly spent the day out running errands.  Today, I am going to get a facial and then it's off to a hair appt.  I need to return a rental car and pick up Ben's car from the shop.  

I really just feel scattered.  It's obvious in this blog, you can read, plainly, my lack of focus.  I can't believe how much needs to get done in my life...

"Table for One"

So Ben is out of town this week conducting an audit at a client in Globe.  He said it snowed today there and I can't imagine that he's only a couple of hours away and experiencing that kind of weather!!!

I have found myself alone this evening.  It's the "dawn" of a few vacation days.  I've taken some time off of work to clean my house (which is in desperate need) and prepare for a weekend of debauchery with Monica.  

I wasn't sure what to do with myself this evening.  I stopped off at ZIA on my home from work and picked up a few CDs.  Since my brand new interest in the harp, I've been interested in purchasing a couple of Joanna Newsom CDs.  We are also going to be seeing Les Miserables at Phoenix Theatre soon and I lost my complete recording of the show years ago so I wanted to get another copy.  

First, I listened to the highlights from Les Miz... I was surprised that they didn't have the complete recording.  I realized I was somewhat glad that they didn't.  I don't know if I could have sat through 3 hours of it.  I'm not sure what was so mesmerizing about this show when I was 14.  I mean, the music is good, but it's not Sondheim.  So, I sang for about an hour straight.  My voice is not as good as it was when I was 14.  It's different. It sounds lower, more raspy and it's harder to be on pitch.  Maybe too many years of cigarettes.  I quit over a year ago and I still hear the effects.  I'm glad no one was around for my embarrassing display.  It took me back to a time when I closed my bedroom door and belted my lungs out at my parent's house.  The experience was comforting and Schmooey (my cat) sat with me; listening, looking, purring and enjoying.  

I've been listening to Joanna Newsom for the last couple of hours and zoning out.  I've checked out a couple of different harp performances on youtube and I'm so excited!  I guess I didn't initially realize that playing the harp could mean more than a couple of classical crescendos and celtic doodles.  I've listened to Led Zeppelin, the Beatles and musical theatre, all realized through the harp!  I'm encouraged that it's even possible to play jazz on the harp!  

Now, the boys are here for a little band practice, Rockband that is!

A Different Musical Direction

I recognize that I mostly blog about food and little else.  I hope that if you are reading my blog, you won't mind that I am going to take a different direction with this particular one.  After all, my blog is called the "Life and Times of Jodels" and not "The Road to Rawsomeness".

On Saturday, I went to the symphony with Rick, Cris, Danen and Ben.  I hadn't been to they symphony in so long.  It was a pleasure to be able to go.  The program was a bit unconventional and it didn't feel like the pieces went together, Bach's Piano Concerto and a couple of Stravinsky pieces.  Stravinsky's grandson was in the audience.  I had a few take-aways that were worth noting.  One of my take-aways was that if you close your eyes and absorb all of the rustling about in symphony hall (people opening wrappers, talking, moving in their seat, etc.), the music almost starts to sound like a vinyl LP.  I thought that was pretty cool.  My other take-away, and the point of this blog, is that playing the harp is something I want to do.  

I think I have considered playing the harp before, but I was never in a position to do so.  I remembered someone saying that pianists have a much easier time learning how to play the harp than most.  I did some research yesterday and found out a bit more about the instrument.  I found a teacher in town who also rents harps.  I've emailed her and already received a response back.  I'm hoping to get together with her at some point and figure out where to start.  Apparently there are several different harps, but for the purpose of this blog - let's say there are 2, a pedal harp (the type used in symphonies) and a lever harp.  It turns out that most beginners learn how to play on a lever harp.  It's great that I can rent a harp before making a commitment to purchase one since lever harps range in price from $2,000-$4,000 and pedal harps range from $15,000 to $60,000.  I'm pretty excited about my new interest.  We'll see how it goes. 

I did more reading up on facts and one factoid is that unlike most instruments that don't sound great when a beginner is learning (read violin), the harp always sounds great.  

Who knows?  Maybe in a couple of years, I'll be ready to play "for hire" at weddings.  

Buy Local!

Thanks to our friends, Pat and Roberta, we pick up CSA groceries every Saturday from Unlimited Coffee.  It was one of the best wedding gifts we got and we think of them every week.  It's a joy to go pick up the bag and find out what it's in it.

Today, Ben made steamed kale and cooked beets- both from our grab bag.  I didn't try either, since they were cooked, but I always enjoy the carrots.  They don't even need to be peeled, they are so good!  

It's great to support local farming.  We love that we are cutting down on the gas that it takes to deliver the groceries.  We are also composting, which is another great way to recycle.  The City of Phoenix offers a compost bin for $5- you can't beat that!

A picture of the compost bin:

Yay!

Gone Nuts!

Every now and then, I get really excited about a raw food.  I've discovered a few raw foods that are already prepared and I can buy them right off the shelves.  It not only makes my life easier, but it makes me feel more normal.  I don't have to spend time washing the blender and the food processor 5 times in the course of an hour.  

One of my latest discoveries is Gone Nuts! by Living Intentions. I was so excited by the garlic and rosemary nuts, I bought, that I had to email them to let them know how freakin' happy their nuts made me.  I also emailed Whole Foods to tell them how excited I was to go to the grocery store last night and see MORE raw food than usual.  

Yay for Gone Nuts!  Yay for Whole Foods!  

Eat your "Oaties"

I'm concluding breakfast and wanted to get in a quick blog before I get ready for work.

On a regular basis I eat a breakfast cereal that I've dubbed "Oaties", like Wheaties, only different. The recipe comes from Jennifer Cornbleet's Raw Food Made Easy book. The "Oaties" consist of rolled oats, sunflower seeds, crushed almonds, raisins and agave nectar. Sometimes, I slice a banana and put it over the cereal; you could also use strawberries or another type of berry. Then, I pour almond milk over the cereal. The recipe for almond milk comes from her book, but it is uber easy. Soaked almonds (1.5 c), soaked dates (3), 2.5c of H2O. Then, you run the mixture through a blender to liquefy and a sprout bag to strain it. I had to learn this the hard way; I was using cheesecloth and it was a big mess.

This morning I opened up a milk-free capsule of acidophilus and put it into my cereal. I am starting to become interested in the benefits of probiotics.

Well, it's off to get ready for work.

Raw Relief

Ben and I went to Madala Tea Room for dinner, so I could officially have something to eat.  I had their beet raw-violi, which is delicious.  I prefer turnips to beets in my raw-violi, but their cheese sauce (pine nuts, etc.) and marinara is far superior to the one I make.

Then, we went to whole foods so I could get a few things... produce, living corn chips (by Leaf Cuisine), sunflower seed living bread, etc.  When we got home, I made some guacamole - mashed avocados, tomatoes, salt, pepper and a touch of lemon juice.  I'm enjoying some of the corn chips with my guacamole.  Can't eat too much, I'm just not that hungry.

I'm also drinking my Synergy Trilogy drink.  I only buy one a week usually and try to make it last a few days.  It's so expensive.  I love it because it's naturally carbonated, so it's like drinking raw soda.  

I feel really good and happy.  I am still a little sad that I didn't make it through the cleanse, but I just love the raw food!

Confidence Shattered

Well, I made the mistake of not drinking enough lemonade and going too long without it.  I had only had 2 glasses by the time 3pm rolled around and this was the biggest mistake that I had made.

Just 15 minutes ago, I ate a couple bites of raw cheesecake.  Wow, it was great.  Then, I ate a couple bits of raw pecan pie.  Yum.  Then, a couple of raw almonds.  Guess that is the end of the line of the master cleanse for me.  I hadn't eaten any food since Monday... so I got through 2.5 days of no food and just OJ or spicy lemonade.  

I feel guilty, but I'm also relieved that I didn't grab the cooked sweet potatoes that Ben had in the fridge.  Or worse yet, go to the mexican restaurant and pick up a bean & cheese burrito with guacamole smothered in enchilada sauce.  Even worse, go get some pasta with meat in it!  I'm gonna stick with the raw ways for now.  That's my hope.  

I'm sad, but I also have no idea how people get through this.  I was genuinely hungry.  I just had a few bites of my raw food and I feel more satisfied.  Since I didn't go to the grocery store, guess I better figure out what's lying around and figure it out for the next few days...

I'll post about the "Road to Rawsomeness" now.

Morning #2

I'm feeling more confident this morning than I did last night. Last night, I was ready to succumb and give in. It had only been one day, though, and that gave me cause to pause. I was like, "seriously?!? I can't even make it through a couple of days?". So I decided to see how I feel tomorrow, which is today.

I've just woken up and done the SWF. It worked so quickly that I had to stop drinking it midway through and go to the restroom. My headache seems to be gone, for the time being. I seemed to have gotten enough sleep, but I'd love to just lay around today and not worry about work. Alas, a couple more days.

I got on the scale first thing this morning. Even though this is more about health than weight, I was delighted with the results. After my first attempt at the MC, I lost 8 pounds. I lost another 5 pounds while I was eating raw. I had maintained that loss of 13 pounds for the last couple of weeks. AND I AM BACK TO THAT INITIAL 13 POUNDS DOWN!

I was sort of disappointed that I didn't lose anymore weight while eating raw. Particularly, since I really need to lose about 65 pounds. My weight stayed where it was and didn't move for a couple of weeks. I was disappointed, but not devastated because there could have been different reasons for this - I had just gotten off of the medication that typically makes you lose weight. I was eating too many fats/oils and needed to modify once I adjusted more to the raw food lifestyle. I needed to get back to the gym. Whatever the reasons, I was still down about 47 pounds from where I was at my heaviest a couple of years ago. I still felt ok...

After eating cooked food last week, especially the mexican food and pizza I ate on Monday, I had gained 5 pounds. I weighed myself Tuesday morning and I was up 5 pounds. Weight does fluctuate, but I tend to weigh myself at the same time and have the same variables. I don't find that my weight changes that much. I'm back to where I was before the cooked food, you've calculated correctly - I've lost 5 pounds in two days. My belief is that if I continue the raw lifestyle after the cleanse, I will maintain my weight loss, for the most part.

While it would be great to lose more weight and, of course, it's a more encouraging reason to stay on the cleanse - I want to stay focused. This is about the effects of cleansing, not weight loss.

First Day, Nearly Complete

Today was much harder than the first day I had in December.  I'm not sure why it felt so challenging, but it was difficult.  

I'm not really hungry, but the whiffs of food seem to seek me out and get stuck in my nose.  This morning when I got to the office for a meeting, there was a bucket of fresh bagels from Einstein's.  Now, I have resisted bagels for some time.  This morning, however, they must have been super fresh.  Sure enough, about 15 minutes later one of those attending said "wow, my bagel is still warm".  *sigh*  My office is not far from the office kitchen and mostly I smell offensive things like fish heated in the microwave, but today I distinctly smelled a few things that were intoxicating.  

I avoided the kitchen at all costs, except to make my lemonade.  2 tablespoons of fresh lemon juice, 2 tablespoons of grade b maple syrup and cayenne pepper mixed with 8 ounces of water.  I usually mix about 16 ounces at a time.  I drink it extremely fast so the cayenne doesn't get to me.  Some people say you should sip it, that would kill me.  

It is recommended that you drink 8-12 glasses daily.  I have made 6 glasses and only gotten through 5.  I had this challenge the last time too.  I just can't seem to drink 8 glasses of the lemonade daily.  I read somewhere that you really need to, but I don't want to push myself too far.

I had a headache throughout most of the day, which is not uncommon the first couple of days of the cleanse.  It got so bad at one point, I just needed to close my eyes for about 10 minutes and chill.  That's ok, though, since I worked 10 hours today and didn't really take a lunch break.  

My headache never subsided and I feel exhausted.  I just want to go to sleep right now.  I think I'm going to make the tea and go lay down with the TV on in my bedroom.  

I was taking note, this morning, of the fact that my hygiene preferences have changed.  I was washing with this organic Moroccan rose body wash, salt, body butter and oil realizing that my preference has turned to only organic since January and the more natural - the better.  Immediately after my first cleanse, I bought this tea tree oil deodorant and toothpaste - both are totally vegan and organic.  It makes me feel like I'm doing something right.  I'm making things better somehow... in my own small, maybe significant, way.  Maybe it's that I am just being kind to myself and that is speaking volumes to me.  

Ben is eating dinner now and that is a rough time.  It's comfortable to eat at home...

Time for tea and rest.  Day One - Done

First Morning

This is going to be an interesting morning.  I attempted to wake up at 5:30am, but had to hit "snooze" several times.  I tried to go to bed earlier and was succeeding in drifting off to sleep to a meditation CD that features "sounds of nature".  It is super cheesy and even includes howling wolves.  It helps me fall asleep faster and I was almost out when Ben decided his earplugs weren't drowning out the sound and he turned it off.  I had to start the process of falling asleep again.

It's important to wake up earlier when you are cleansing so that you can make sure you are not far from the "facilities".  I am up now and just finished the salt water flush (SWF).  32 oz of H2O and 2 teaspoons of sea salt.  Most people are totally grossed out over drinking it, for some reason it doesn't bother me as much.  I am not typically drawn to salty foods, nor do I like them, but I can do this pretty easily.  

Why the SWF?  Basically, salt is not absorbed into your system and it causes gravity to pull all of the waste down or out quickly.  The effect is nearly immediate.  In fact, in the course of writing this blog, I've already run to the bathroom a few times.  Peter Glickman, the man that made the lemonade diet famous again, calls it the agitator cycle and refers to the lemonade as the rinse cycle.

I can tell it's going to be an odd morning already.  I was slightly constipated, which has not been the case in over a month.  I attribute it to the cooked food that I ate on Sunday.  Since I've been eating raw food, I've been super regular.  Cooked food takes longer for your body to process.  Sometimes, the digestion process can take over a week!!!  This is not the case with raw food, your body digests it very quickly.  

I'm going to go peel some lemons to run through the juicer.  It's not the best case scenario since the lemons loose some nutrients after time has passed.  The ideal situation is to use them right after they've been juiced.  So much easier, though, to make a batch of lemon juice and utilize it throughout the day.  Plus, you get more juice and organic lemons are not cheap.  

My focus today is to try to ignore the smells of food.  I nearly went nuts last night when I saw a tupperware container of fresh broccoli and lettuce.  I almost justified breaking down last night and it wasn't even day one.  

Purpose

Just before the New Year began, I began the Master Cleanse.  For those of you that don't know what the Master Cleanse is, I will quickly explain.  

Morning - salt water flush consisting of sea salt and water 

Day - spicy lemonade composed of organic lemons, organic grade b maple syrup and cayenne pepper 

Evening - laxative tea

I managed to get through about five days, but the Master Cleanse is supposed to be done for a minimum of ten days.  I got so excited about a raw food diet that I stopped early to embark on my journey with raw food.  I've been eating mostly raw since then.  

Last week, I justified eating cooked vegan potatoes.  Wish I hadn't... one thing led to another.  A second day of eating potatoes.  Then, pizza and then, eventually, mexican food.  My headaches came back.  I gained weight and I felt cranky as hell.

So, I've embarked on the MC (Master Cleanse) journey again.  Today, my diet consisted of only orange juice in preparation.  I'm about to drink the laxative tea and will begin my cleanse with the hope that I will get through all ten days.  

My ultimate goal, is to go back to a raw vegan diet and have an easier time sustaining it.  I had no problem sustaining a 100% raw diet for several weeks.  During this time, I quit my migraine medication and welbutrin, which I first started taking to quit smoking.  

Many people on the MC find it helpful to blog about their experiences.  I just learned quite a bit from one person's blog and was inspired.  

My friends also ask me about my raw lifestyle on a regular basis, so this is for all of you that may be curious.  

Welcome to the Life & Times of Jodels!